I first came across this splendid Cyril Tawney
song "On a British Submarine" when browsing through Geoffrey Brace's Something to Sing
. This is a very naval song on a very naval subject namely on the idiocy of ceremonial occasions thrust onto unwilling, unasked naval ratings by their collective Lordships. The song tells the tale of a luckless crew of a submarine being required to salute Her Majesty on returning from South Africa in the Royal Yacht Britannia. Our heroes are interrupted by "... a swarm of gnats as big as bats .."
which after a day and night of futile waving are compelled to dive to shake off their tormentors.
Eleven verses of wonderful stuff and nonsense!
Tawney himself tells the story of writing this song in the lyric link given above.